


System Maintenance

by Xiaojian



Category: Metal Gear
Genre: Banter, Blindness, Gen, Robot Anatomy, Seriously read the notes, Sparring
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-12
Updated: 2016-10-12
Packaged: 2018-08-22 00:23:31
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 615
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8265902
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Xiaojian/pseuds/Xiaojian
Summary: Samuel still has plenty to learn about how Desperado cyborgs work.
(Also, please read the notes for an important message regarding my Metal Gear fics, if you care about them.)





	

**Author's Note:**

> All right, right off the bat I want to say: I'm taking a break from writing Metal Gear fics.
> 
> I love the series, so much, and I do love writing for it, but lately, I've seen some very, very negative responses to my works. I'd like to think I can handle criticism, but these go beyond criticism into...personal insults on my character, because of what I write. I know that I shouldn't take it to heart, but it really has dampened a whole lot of my motivation to write for these games.
> 
> I know that I'm not the best writer. I know that I'm not the best communicator. I'm bad at understanding how things work, and my English isn't crystal-clear either. (Though, by now I've forgotten almost all of my Chinese too, so I don't know what I'm good for anymore...) But I honestly did my best to contribute to this community.
> 
> Honestly, for a while I was tempted to just delete all of my Metal Gear works. But I won't do that, because there are some very nice people out there who seem to genuinely enjoy them.
> 
> To all those people, I would like to sincerely thank you. And I promise that I will return to writing for the series. (I still have stories I want to finish, and new ones I want to write.) Maybe in a few weeks, or over a month - but I will definitely come back to it. Until then, I'll be focusing on writing for my other fandoms.
> 
> Finally, about this fic: I had this kicking around in my drafts for months, but I kept forgetting to finish it. Have some Desperado dorks.

“What do you mean, you can’t?”

Monsoon waved an irritated hand at the paper Sam was shaking in front of his face.

“Precisely what I said. I can’t read it.”

Sam glanced down at the bit of paperwork, as if it might have changed since he looked at it thirty seconds ago. “Why not? Your spoken English seems pretty flawless to me. Not that I can claim to be a native speaker, but if you need reading lessons…” 

“I can read English, Sam.” Monsoon’s voice was weary. He walked to a long desk at the edge of the office and sat on the tabletop, crossing his legs at the ankles. He pointed to the base of his ear. “If you need me to read something, just transfer it to me directly.”

“I don’t know if you’ve forgotten this already, but my squishy human body doesn’t have the capabilities of a smartphone.”

Monsoon shook his head and tapped the front of his helmet. “Can you see my eyes through this?”

The swordsman leaned closer, squinting.

“No.”

“Exactly. Now, why would I be able to see anything through it?”

Sam raised an eyebrow. “You had a helmet made that you can’t see through?”

“On the contrary. When it’s functioning properly I can see quite well. It’s my own eyes that were the problem.”

“And the past tense is because...”

“I don’t know about you, but I deal with my problems head-on. In this case, the eyes I was born with are rotting in someone’s trash. Useless things. I had them scooped out years ago.”

Sam’s lip curled. “Please tell me it wasn’t literal scooping.”

“Oh, quite literal. Do you want to see what I got put in their place?” He reached up and began to fiddle with his helmet’s locking mechanism.

“No, no thanks.” Sam looked away just in case. Monsoon snickered.

“Really, it’s nothing hideous.”

“All the same, I think I’m fine without knowing.”

He leaned back on the table, swinging his legs. “My point is, my new ‘eyes’ are wired to work with my helmet. Said helmet, you might recall, is currently in cooldown to update its software.”

He actually hadn’t recalled that, until Monsoon mentioned it. But he had heard something about it before, from Mistral. All of Desperado’s bodies required regular maintenance. It would be unfortunate for someone to confront them while everyone was completely shut down, so repairs and updates were staggered out on a strict schedule, to ensure that only one part of only one employee’s body was out of service at any given time.

“So, at the moment, you’re wearing a useless bowl on your head.”

“Precisely.”

“That’s...hilarious.”

“Hey, I may be blind, but I can still wipe the floor with you.”

Sam bumped his helmet with the heel of his palm, earning him an agitated noise. “Are you going to prove that statement?”

“Oh, you’re on.”

-

Monsoon may not have had his sight at the moment, but he could still hear Mistral’s disapproving throat-clearing and heel-tapping.

“So, you destroyed a large portion of our practice room, knocked six of your body portions out of working order, and broke Mr.Rodriguez’s leg, wrist, and ankle because...?”

He grinned at her from the operating table, where two technicians were hard at work piecing him back together. “C’mon, you know I never got to see how our new guy fared with me in one-on-one combat.”

Sam laughed from the other operating table, where another doctor was tending to his soft human parts. “Next you’re going to tell her you won.”

“Nah. I’m generous enough to call this one a tie. If anything, the wall was the real loser in this fight.”


End file.
